1) C1: Darling, how many times must I tell you to stop judo-flipping your classmates whenever you’re having a quarrel?
C2: But I’m competent, Mom!
C1: You’re eight!
2) C1: Trust me!
C2: Last time I did, I got shot. So no.
3) Sorry, I speak American.
4) If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving is not for you!
5) Next time you wave, use all of your fingers. Please?
6) Whoever believes in telekinesis, raise my hand.
7) Always remember that you’re unique, just like everyone else.
8) Auntie Em: hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog with me. -Dorothy.
9) Don’t drive and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.
*****
4 through 9 I believe I copied from somewhere on the internet — but they were too good to pass up.
